I miss what it used to feel like for other people who read this blog when it had no followers.. but don't get me wrong.. this is in no way negativity. I don't want people to get my thoughts jumbled wrongly. It's just that I have gotten comments from those who read in the beginning.. the very beginning. They say they miss the 'old polly'.. and how she was. What is that, and who was she? How can I change this? A person changes with time.. it's as simple as that.. and it makes me want to bang this computer against a tree.
You know that grey shade that isn't quite in the middle of anywhere? No matter how hard you try to push it to one side it just won't turn more black or white? That's all I can feel right now. Life hits you in the face, and then what? I just woke up from a dead sleep where I was hugging him so hard that I swear to god I had a smile on my face in my sleep. Now let's zoom in on the reality: I woke up to one text message saying that I wasn't even worth his phone call. I feel numb to say the least.
When is it time for me to move on with this "life"? I feel as if I am moping around my apartment constantly drawing, cleaning, having meetings.. and for what? What do they mean? What are they for? I'm not one to tell you.. or to know. I know it feels empty. Is it because I have constantly bombarded myself with relationships for over the past year whether I wanted to or not? Possibly so. Here I go, again.. back to finding myself. If I could only take my own advice, here. Haha, isn't it funny that I can archive you to past feelings?
skirt- Salvation Army
tights- cut off; from Salvation Army
shoes- $4 Salvation Army
blouse- Salvation Army
pin- vintage, bakelite plastic, gift from my Grandmother Kutch
earrings- gift from my Grandmother Kutch, vintage 1950's made in Germany
I hope you have a wonderful day, and PLEASE don't forget to enter my giveaway listed below!
Also, I would really really reallllly appreciate it if you visited My Best Friend Jules, because I am Blogger of the Week over at their chic little blog! Thanks so much, guys! :)